Big Dumb Rock thats Fatter than Ya Mums Bum

Hello! Due to plain old bad luck i need 1 or 2 of the following, a Singing Guitarist (male) OR Singer (male) OR Guitar (Female most welcome OR male) For successful Heavy Original Rock Band tuned to C that's why male Blues Vocal sounds great.... or what ever you got that works. Age is irrelevant because it's all about the Music....Man. A sense of Humor is a must to be in this band which is sorta Black Sabbath meets Clutch meets The Datsuns meets Alice Cooper.